I don’t want to:
have little fingers
tinkering with my crystals
fucking up my energy
for a whole ass year
walk them
feed them
teach them
patience through
voodoo dolls
& vanilla extract
be that girl
who got knocked up
side the head
by some man
who said I love you
tower over them
so they can learn
a child’s place
is beneath
me & my history
of being beaten
into apologies & fear
of my body
know they could
be a victim or
a perpetrator
or a nobody
play momma
& daddy
& God
I don’t want to explain
I didn’t want them